Dr. David D. Young
February 11, 2007
Luke 6: 17-26
Leviticus 11: 9-12, 18: 22
Exodus 35: 2
"What About Sexual Orientation?"

When I say Snickers candy bar what image immediately pops into your mind? If you were a viewer of the super bowl this past Sunday or if you’ve watched the news since then you know that the image I’m referring to is of two men leaning over the engine of a car – each eating from the other end of a Snickers candy bar – till they seemingly kiss. Reactions to that commercial were very mixed. Some people snickered. Some people were offended and there was probably a range of everything in between.

Humor has a wonderful place in our lives. However, humor has always been used as a way of putting other groups down, people who are different from ourselves - and that certainly has been true for gays and lesbians.

I remember back to my childhood when jokes where told about fags and queers – faggots. I’m pleased to say – I seldom if ever hear such jokes anymore and I think that’s a healthy sign of our times. As I struggled with this sermon for this morning – there is so much that could be said - and it is quite a complex subject – and I was literally overwhelmed with what to say. So I thought I’d sit down and just have a chat this morning. (At this point, Dr. Young sat on a stool in the middle of the chancel.)

I’m sure that some will wish I didn’t say what I’m going to say this morning and I’m sure some will wish that I’ll say more and I doubt that I’ll say everything you might like me to say but that’s OK. I’m just going to share my thoughts for this morning.

Each of us has our own experience – our own stories – our own background – history – our own family setting that we grew up in – our own bodies. We each have our own experiences with people of the same sex and people of the opposite sex. We each have our own genetics and of all the billions and billions and billions of people that have ever lived on the face of the earth – each one of us is unique and distinctive. So, I can never say totally what it is to be someone else. In fact, I really wouldn’t want to - I have enough trouble just trying to be me.

But I can never try to speak for someone who is gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender, I just can’t try to do that and I would never want to speak for someone who is different from me. But I can listen and care and be sensitive to what it might be like to be different from me. When people have been oppressed throughout history and mistreated and misunderstood it’s been difficult to have any positive self-esteem, depression can set in and despair. That’s true as the children were singing the spiritual about going up yonder. John Stansell and I were chatting about it and we don’t want the kids to have this notion that their going up yonder any time soon. But when you don’t have much to hope for and when you’ve been mistreated as the slaves were, that was one thing you could hope for – going up yonder soon to get out of all this bad stuff.

So, what about sexual orientation? And how does one come to understand one’s own sexual orientation and when is that established in a person? Boy if I had the answer to that – well – nobody has the answer to that. Psychologists, doctors, scientists, theologians have all tried to weigh in on the subject but it’s a very complicated issue. Born that way – was it learned – the arguments can go back and forth.

You probably have read about Reverend Ted Haggard, who was the President of the Evangelicals in the United States, because he was found having a relationship with a male masseur. It just came out in the news a few days ago that after three weeks of intense treatment he is now "completely heterosexual." Go figure?

I want to share out of my own experience and I recognize that taking a risk on speaking on this subject that there are going to be as many opinions, thoughts and feelings about this as there are people listening this morning. And so with complete respect for your views - and I would welcome an opportunity to chat with anyone at another time about your thoughts and views - I’m going to share some of my own and I’m not speaking for anybody else but myself. So having said that, I’ll begin.

I grew up in Kokomo, Indiana that’s about right in the middle of the state of Indiana and pretty much right in the middle of the United States. I came from a very stable family, a very traditional family, a very loving family with good Midwestern values. I was sheltered. We traveled some as a family but I was sheltered by and large and then I went to the west coast for my education. In seminary I landed in San Francisco back in the 70’s. And the first time I walked down Polk Street and saw two men holding hands, I was shocked, speechless. And thus began a journey that has gone on ever since.

In seminary we had lots of conversations about homosexuality. And now in retrospect, I realize that a number of my classmates were gay or lesbians. I didn’t know it at the time, but I began to think about those issues. And early on my thinking led me to believe that homosexuality was sinful but as Christians we were called to love the sinner. Over time, my thoughts about that changed. And I came to see, and it didn’t happen all at once - it took years to finally realize in getting to know people, instead of just talking about it out there hypothetically, that it was an absolutely acceptable way of life. That’s my view. It’s not sinful.

Then all the debate and discussion ensued about same sex unions – which I struggled with quite honestly at first. How should I, as a clergy, who performs marriages deal with that? Over time I realized it made sense. And then same sex marriage – what to do about that? I’m going to circle back to that in a few minutes. Needless to say, my journey probably like yours has led to changes in thoughts and viewpoints and perspectives.

The Church – big capital C – has always been hung up with sins of the flesh. I mean lets face it –anything that has to do with sex – that has just been problematic to the church over the centuries. In most denominations the question of whether or not to ordain gays and lesbians is huge. It’s tearing some of the other churches up right now as we speak. I’m grateful we’re part of a denomination that is passed that one.

We are the first church to ordain a gay minister back in the 1960’s. And this church has a wonderful history - some seven and a half years ago you began a process – an open and affirming process – chaired by Chuck McConnell. That group did some wonderful work – I’ve read through all the documentation that was recorded as a part of that process and I’m very grateful for the process the church went through.

Three and a half years of conversations and struggle. Struggling with tough issues - that’s what we do. And that’s what you did. And then some four years ago, Susie Craig, Sally Colegrove, and Tom Stiers preached a sermon in which they all advocated becoming an open and affirming church. And then the church back in March of 2003 had a special meeting – voted to become open and affirming and I want to share just for memory’s sake, because you all know this but our newer people and our guests this morning might not, that the statement of welcome that was adopted, I think it is very, very important.

Ever aware of our needs we acknowledge as our Biblical mandate the call to feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, receive the stranger, clothe the naked, care for the sick and visit the prisoner. Matthew 25: 35

First Church’s mission is to proclaim the gospel to all people and to work for the promotion of justice, the reign of peace, and human understanding in all our relationships. We strive through our example to overcome exclusionary practices, discrimination and violence in our society based upon considerations, including but not limited to race, ancestry, age, physical or mental limitations, gender, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and religious background. We commit ourselves to work towards ending hatred, prejudice and discrimination, thereby providing a safe physical, emotional and spiritual haven. As Jesus accepted and included all people, so do we as individuals and as a congregation welcome all who wish to enter our community of faith and invite their participation in the full life of the church. Without exception, we accept each person who joins our community of faith, as an individual and our equal within God’s family.

Therefore, First Congregational Church of Greenwich declares itself to be open and affirming; open to all for participation, membership, leadership and employment, and affirming all who wish to join us as children of God. We continue to give thanks for God’s guidance in our journey of faith.

That may seem familiar to you who read it regularly but I’m telling you that is a powerful, powerful witness to who we are and to whom we belong.

This past week, John Stansell and I had a terrific conversation about what I was going to be preaching on. He told me that as the church was preparing for the process of becoming open and affirming he really wondered if it was necessary to go through all that. I mean his life was pretty well settled and things were OK. He just wasn’t sure that that needed to happen. But once the vote was taken – and that statement affirmed – John shared that a weight was lifted from off his soul that he didn’t even realize was there. Now, that friends, is powerful, it spoke to me in a way I never understood before – it was profound. Thanks John, I appreciate you.

Now, what does the Bible say about all of this. The Bible says a whole lot about a lot and a little about a lot. The Bible can be used to proof text just about anything. So you take any topic you want and with enough time of mining the scriptures we can find something to help proof text that and give you a sure case to justify your position. For me, the importance of scriptures and taking the Bible seriously but not always literally is to experience a relationship with the living God.

So, let me just have a little fun with Dr. Laura, who came out against homosexuality pretty strongly a few years ago. This is an anonymous piece written back to her.

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s law. I have learned a great deal from you, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Leviticus 1:9). The problem is my neighbors claim the odor is not pleasing to them. How should I deal with this?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as it suggest in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Leviticus 15:19-24) The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Leviticus 25: 44 states that I may buy slaves from the nations that are around us. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans but not to Canadians. Can you clarify?

I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Leviticus 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don’t agree. Can you settle this?

Leviticus 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.

--Anonymous

So, how do we discover a living relationship with God through scripture? Jesus gave us the beatitudes, "blessed are you who weep now for you will laugh." How many people have you known that have been put down in one way or another? Their spirits have been weeping for a long time. Go back to our conversation about humor.

Blessed are you when people hate you and when they exclude you, revile you, and defame you on account of the son of man. I have to read into that anyone who embodies love is in a living relationship with the son of man and with God. You do your own interpretation.

What about marriage and the Bible’s position on marriage? For all of us who are male, and would be so inclined, we could have many wives and concubines. Anyone caught in adultery would be stoned to death. A women who would marry and wasn’t a virgin would automatically be thrown out and the marriage nullified. And even until not that long ago – just a little over a hundred years ago and back through the centuries – women were considered a piece of property and in the wedding ceremony the clergy would say as the father of the bride walked his daughter down the aisle, "who gives this women to be married to this man?" For she was a piece of property. And weddings are still arranged in some places today by fathers and grooms.

Well, needless to say the whole understanding of marriage has changed since the Bible was written. Marriage is a wonderful, wonderful thing. The sanctity of marriage is something I believe in – very much so. When we counsel with couples preparing to be married we take that very serious.

Same sex marriage I think is something that is coming, too. I don’t know how well it will be received in our lifetime but I suspect in a generation or two from now it will be. Connecticut is struggling with it as we speak. And I know how I feel about it not because of my upbringing but because I’ve changed and I’ve listened and I’ve tried to be sensitive. For those who say allowing same sex marriage will weaken and water down and threaten the institution of marriage - I say baloney. Homosexuals do not threaten the institution of marriage – heterosexuals do.

So, what’s at stake? What’s at stake in same sex marriages? Well, for same sex couples, I suspect for many of them a lot. And it ain’t my life – it’s theirs. For me it’s a justice issue, it’s one in which the privileges and rights, the opportunities and the status are so important. And as long as we use separate language we delineate differences that’s how we create second class citizens, that’s how we create people who aren’t quite the same as us.

Same sex marriage? I hope so.

Amen!